


Thrown to the Twilight (Sleep Well Tonight)

by tasteofink



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Canon Compliant, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Nightmares, Ronan Lynch Loves Adam Parrish, Slow Dancing, i'm limited on tags here cause it's very short, just read it, please, proceed, there are hands there is a kitchen and there is kissing, there is fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-24 07:48:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20702435
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tasteofink/pseuds/tasteofink
Summary: When Ronan still has bad dreams, there is one good one with life worn hands, blue eyes, and a mouthful of peanut butter.





	Thrown to the Twilight (Sleep Well Tonight)

**Author's Note:**

> Writer's block bas been a relentless, overbearing wall and this short, most likely not great little thing is the result of distraction from a more lengthy, separate idea.
> 
> If you read this, thank you. If you leave a comment/kudos, thank you x100. Either way, I hope you enjoy! 
> 
> (Title is from "They Appear at Night" by Mat Kerekes)
> 
> ~~~

Somewhere around two in the morning, the barns seemed a world of their own. An untouchable land built on blood and dreams. A hideaway. 

Ronan was never one to sleep well so when the sound of animals rustling in the brush filtered in through the open window, he went downstairs to watch. They were gone by the time he sat, but he stayed regardless. He liked to watch the grass in the distance sway in the breeze like an ocean, got a kick out of trying to decipher just which lights were his own dream things floating around or fireflies. The creak of the screen door alerted him to a new presence and his eyes fell closed when Adam slid his arms over his shoulders, locked his hands against Ronan’s chest.

“I woke up and you were gone,” Adam mutterd tiredly. “I figured you came out here.”

“Missed me?” Ronan teased.

Adam nodded against Ronan’s cheek and Ronan nuzzled into the touch, held Adam’s wrist to keep him in place.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

It was Ronan’s turn to nod and Adam’s to press into the motion, cheek to cheek.

“Bad night,” Ronan said quietly, eyes on the field in front of them.

Adam pulled away from Ronan just to sit beside him. Ronan threw his arm over Adam’s shoulder to pull him close and Adam leaned in as close as he could without toppling them over, fiddled with the cross that dangled from Ronan’s neck. Adam didn’t need to ask and Ronan didn’t need to tell him- the dark thing that lived in Ronan, less a Cabeswater demon and more his own, was creeping out as it tended to some nights.

It was hard not to think about loneliness when it threatened so often, harder not to think about loss when it accompanied him like a shadow, looming and always close. Except in the dark- then it was everywhere, stretched and smothering.

The worst nights meant Ronan would relive it- finding his father or mother, remnants of what they were. Other nights he simply felt the gaping hole grow, called the names of his brothers or best friends or Adam and got nothing back in response.

Tonight the latter met with the former, some twisted, half true memory of his mother's death and he called first for her. He refused to call for his brothers because _they can’t see this, they can’t see her like this_ and tried for Adam next, but his voice seemed to stop abruptly, like his breath was cut off, like there was a volume button that his mind turned all the way down, leaving nothing but white noise.

Ronan caught Adam’s hand where it moved softly against Ronan’s chest, fingers still toying with the necklace. Adam looked up and let their hands slot together, bent into Ronan when Ronan kissed his head through his hair.

“Ro.”

“Hm?”

“You look terrible.”

“Shit, Parrish. You could be fucking nice about it.”

Adam laughed softly and his breath tickled Ronan’s neck. Ronan couldn’t help when he smiled back. “I meant tired,” Adam explained. “You need to get some rest.”

“Like I’m not trying.”

Adam nodded, fixed himself against Ronan. Ronan toyed with Adam’s hand, measured their fingers, slid them together and apart, pet his knuckles. Adam closed his eyes, but his fingers moved gently against Ronan’s.

“Go back to bed, Parrish.”

“I’m ok.”

“C’mon,” Ronan urged. “You’re falling asleep on me.”

“Suddenly that’s such a bad thing.”

“Not what I meant,” Ronan said with narrowed eyes.

“I know,” Adam yawned.

Ronan adjusted to rest his head on Adam’s chin. He tilted his head back a bit, gazed up at the sky. The stars seemed to burn brighter over the Barns, not just because there was no light pollution to cover the view. The dark here was different- it was meant to be interrupted, broken by light. The dark didn’t always want to be dark.

“I’m hungry,” Adam said, breaking the comfortable silence.

“It’s the middle of the night.”

“So?”

“So,” Ronan gently pushed away from Adam and stood, stretched his hand to help Adam up. “What should we have?”

Adam smiled and Ronan wrapped him in a loose embrace to walk to the kitchen, toes bumping heels, quiet laughter in the air. Adam opened the fridge and Ronan frowned, separated to check the pantry. Both were nearly empty- the two of them were terrible at keeping a good stock in the house and it would always come down to empty cabinets and shelves to get them to the grocery store.

“Well we have a sip of milk left,” Adam said into the fridge before he let the door swing closed. “And this half eaten roll of cookie dough.”

Ronan turned with a jar of peanut butter in hand and the last few slices of bread in the other.

Ronan shrugged. “So peanut butter sandwiches and cookies?”

Adam went back to the fridge and pulled out a jar of jam that might have a couple of light spreads left. Ronan nodded and put the contents down on the counter.

“Let’s go food shopping tomorrow.”

Adam smiled and raised his eyebrows. “Or pizza again.”

“Don’t tempt me.”

Ronan left Adam to grab his phone from upstairs, set up his speaker to connect to it. Adam, caught up with placing balls of dough on a baking pan, didn’t notice. Ronan interrupted Adam with his arms around Adam’s waist, swayed lightly back and forth and Adam, though he leaned into Ronan’s arms like it was instinct, grumbled at him.

“I’m trying to bake here.”

Ronan nodded and kissed the side of Adam’s neck. “I’m not stopping you.”

They moved as one unit. When Adam bent to put the tray of cookies in the oven, Ronan bent with him. Adam walked to the opposite counter to grab the peanut butter, and Ronan grabbed the bread simultaneously. Ronan regretfully let go to prepare the sandwiches, bumped Adam’s hip with his, a playful dismissal. Adam pulled himself onto the counter top, tapped a finger to the beat of the song that played. Ronan made sure to put extra peanut butter, just the way Adam liked, and earned a smile of approval when he passed the snack to Adam.

“Cookies will be done soon,” Adam said through a sticky mouthful.

“I’ll take care of 'em,” Ronan said.

Ronan leaned beside Adam, elbows on the counter to hold him up. He tilted his head back and met Adam’s eyes and Adam, still trying to unstick peanut butter from the roof of his mouth, offered some semblance of a smile that was more a grimace.

“_I_ look like shit,” Ronan teased.

“Hey,” Adam pouted. “I tried, ok?”

Ronan shifted to stand between Adam’s legs and nodded. He leaned close, intended to kiss Adam, but was met instead with jam spilling out from in between two slices of bread. Adam held the sandwich in between their mouths, eyes crinkled with laughter.

“Asshole.”

“Mhm,” Adam hummed, clearly pleased with himself.

Ronan licked the jam off his lips and Adam pointed out a spot he’d missed. Before Ronan could wipe it away Adam pulled him close, met halfway, and pressed his mouth to the corner of Ronan’s. Ronan’s grip on Adam’s thigh tightened when he felt Adam’s tongue dip out, and Ronan slid his hands up, let go only for a moment before he held Adam’s face and caught his mouth in a kiss that tasted of the sickly sweetness of peanut butter, lingered for a few short beats. Ronan separated just before the oven went off and he noticed Adam thumb at his lip from the corner of his eye when he retrieved the tray of cookies.

“They smell well done,” Adam observed.

Ronan shrugged. “They have to cool off.”

Adam nodded, thumb still against his mouth. Ronan returned to him and when he looked up, Ronan swore his eyes sparkled. They reminded him of dream lights or stars in the low light of the kitchen.

“Parrish?”

“Yes?”

Ronan opened his hand to Adam, chewed his lip. “Would you dance with me?”

Adam bit back a smile and laid his hand in Ronan’s, gave a brief nod. 

“This is corny even for you, Lynch.”

Ronan swept Adam into a twirl and then a quick dip, and Adam’s laugh rang through the kitchen. Ronan pulled Adam close, positioned them to the best of his ability. He guided Adam to drape an arm over his shoulder and Ronan held Adam with one arm against his back, their free hands joined.

“Why do you get to lead?”

“I don’t know,” Ronan shrugged. “I’m taller.”

“Not by much,” Adam said, brows furrowed.

“Who’s counting?” Ronan challenged.

They swayed together, an easy, nearly rhythmless waltz. Ronan’s gaze kept focusing on Adam’s hand in his own, a perfect fit. Ronan knew every inch of them; the bony knuckles, the blue of his veins, calloused skin on the pad of his palms. He memorized them before he held them for the first time and only studied them further, committed every little detail to memory. He brought their joined hands to his mouth and kissed the backs of Adam’s fingers, met Adam’s eyes as he did. 

Ronan kept them moving, feet brushing against feet, bodies warm. Adam carefully followed the steps, rested his head on Ronan’s shoulder. Ronan tucked his chin against Adam’s head, spoke softly.

“Thank you for staying awake with me.”

“I could get used to this,” Adam said.

Ronan smiled to himself. His heart did something strange in his chest, the kind of strange only Adam could cause.

“I don’t know, Parrish. All you’re really doing is losing sleep.”

“I’ll lose more,” he said with certainty.

He didn’t need to say _for you_. They both knew it. Ronan spun Adam through the kitchen, hands joined, moving in small circles together. Adam looked up and Ronan dipped to touch his forehead to Adam’s, let their lips catch for a fleeting second. Adam brought their mouths together again, guided Ronan’s hand to his back and let it rest there. With his arms around Adam’s waist and Adam’s hands on either side of his neck, Ronan led them to the sofa, spun around to sit first. Adam bent a knee onto the couch and Ronan pulled Adam’s hips, thumbs lined up with the indents of his hip bones.

Ronan slid his hands higher when Adam settled in his lap, smoothed over Adam’s ribs and back down. Ronan marveled at the warmth of Adam’s skin, let it radiate against his palms. Adam’s thumb stroked against Ronan’s jaw and Ronan curled into the touch, stared up into Adam’s eyes, let Adam tilt his head up however he pleased. They kissed like the stars burned and Adam came to life under Ronan’s hands, breathed life back into Ronan, kept each other burning bright until they separated.

Their separation didn’t last long. Ronan’s tilted back head and heavy lidded eyes were a plea for Adam to kiss him again and Adam did. Ronan ached deep in his belly, reacted to the swarm of butterflies viscerally, deepened their kiss without really meaning to. Adam didn’t seem to mind, gave into Ronan easily. When they slowed, it was lack of sleep catching up, the hands on the clock pointing closer to four than three. Adam reluctantly climbed off Ronan’s lap and grabbed the blanket they left on the couch for nights like this, lied beside Ronan and covered them both. Ronan made space when Adam squirmed against him, seeking warmth and a place to rest his head, ideally Ronan’s chest.

“Ro?” Adam prompted quietly, fingers traipsing over Ronan’s tattoo where it poked out from under fabric.

“Yeah?”

“I heard you when you were dreaming. You called my name, but you sounded off and I know you don’t want to talk about it, but I just need to know that you’re ok.”

Ronan shifted to look at Adam. His brow was furrowed and his lips were pulled into a slight frown. Stars flickered with worry in his eyes and Ronan held him tight, spoke against his hair.

“I would tell you,” Ronan promised. “I’m ok. I was looking for you, that’s all.”

“Ok,” Adam said.

“Try to sleep, kid.”

“You, too.”

Ronan didn’t, not for a while. He played with Adam’s fingers, gently as to not disturb him, brought Adam’s hand to his mouth when Adam finally fell asleep and kissed each extremity good night. Ronan joined him when the sun threatened to break the dark and woke up with Adam still sound asleep in his arms. He first noted that Adam’s hair was tickling his chin, realized after that their hands were still interlocked. He breathed a sigh of relief when he realized, too, that he dreamed peacefully, both of them seeming well at rest. Ronan wiggled closer to the warmth of Adam’s body and shut his eyes. Bliss like this was not to be wasted.


End file.
